40+FAB Blog

Blinded by the destination

Sometimes, we strive so hard to get to a destination that we miss out on the value, beauty and enjoyment of the journey. You may have experienced this in trying to create the ‘perfect’ marriage, or children, or career.

In our minds eye, we focus on what the destination should look like such that we totally lose sight of the fact that the destination would never be accessible without the paths of the journey that lead us there.

If you want your marriage to be a dream, nagging about what you want your partner to do so you both get there only creates the opposite effect. However, if you go on the journey of being kind, helping them out, sincerely complimenting them, and creating an environment they always want to come home to, then you are living the journey to a successful marriage.

I find that when I lose patience with my children and begin to shout at them to do the right thing, it only makes them nervous and they end up making even more mistakes. However, when I took the time to praise thier efforts, gently point out thier mistakes and correct them, they thrived much better and behaved in the manner I expected. When I was so consumed on what I wanted and not patiently working with them through the journey, it only produced a high pressure situation where no one was satisfied.

Being blinded by the destination makes you lose sight of the paths to get there and one can end up wandering round and round without ever attaining the satisfaction desired. We must keep the destination in mind, but more importantly look for the path to get us there, and walk that path with the same enthusiasm we have reserved for the destination.