As we drove past the airport today, my son saw a couple of planes go over our heads. He then asked if they were landing or taking off, I replied they are taking off because the nose of the plane is pointing upwards. It then occurred to me that the posture of most commercial planes also have their nose pointing upwards when landing.

To take off and rise high, we need to raise our sights and hold our heads up. But it is also crucial that when we are coming down, due to circumstances, failures, or unexpected events, that we do not bow our heads in disappointment or shame. There is a difference between landing and crashing. A plane designed to land with its nose up will crash if it attempts to land with its nose down.

We should imbibe the attitude of keeping our head up no matter what we go through. Whether rising or falling, keep your head up. In good times and bad, keep your head up. When it works and when it doesn’t, keep your head up. Remember the plane that comes down with its head up will land safely and will be ready to take off again.

40+FAB Blog

Are you open for debate?

By Olaolu Faj Opebiyi on

June 9, 2021

- 40+FAB Blog

The idea of debate is quite interesting. In its proper definition, a debate is a formal discussion on a particular matter in a public meeting or legislative assembly, in which opposing arguments are put forward and which usually ends with a vote.

Debating can be traced back to the ancient Greeks hundreds of years ago, and can still be found in our modern day politics. There are loads of merit to a proper debate and much to be learnt as two parties present arguments in a logical and factual manner to an audience who judge which argument is more superior.

A debate is not necessarily about disgracing an opponent, or vanquishing a foe. It seeks the triumph of ideas properly researched and intelligently presented. No one is really a loser in a proper debate as both sides and their listeners would have learnt a lot from the speeches given. It is also worth noting that one cannot be effective at debate if they have no respect for the other parties opinion.

What we try to do in a less formal way as we argue our points with family, friends and colleagues is sometimes far away from what a true debate is meant to be. Our minds are too closed and set on our own opinions, such that we hardly respect, let alone listen, to the view point of our opponents. We engage them purely to prove they are wrong and we are right, without really hearing them out.

We should learn to apply the principles of true debate, and this will certainly broaden our horizons, open up our minds to ideas we would never have entertained otherwise, and sometimes we may possibly find that we are the ones with a less superior argument.

40+FAB Blog

The outsider

By Olaolu Faj Opebiyi on

June 8, 2021

- 40+FAB Blog

Have you ever considered that one day you might be the outsider? You may ask, what do you mean? Well, a time will come when you may have to leave the system you grew up in or are used to, to become a part of another. You could find that you are the outsider if you marry into a tribe different from yours, or you are appointed as a leader in a company you never worked at before, or you are a student who joins a school cohort way after the entry group started.

The outsider is usually greeted with a kind of hostility and given an attitude of let’s see if they will make it here. In spite of the many challenges an outsider could face, why do people still go out of the system to bring one in? Why do a fair number of them excel in spite of the tough terrain they face?

You see, an outsider is seldom ever a Lone Ranger who just happened to find themselves in a new place. They were also part of another group, they also rose in the ranks of their group, they also had things going on, or could make things happen. They developed themselves and grew where they were. So, when they moved, they were able to apply all they had learnt to excel in their new place.

Remember this, one day you might be the outsider. There is however no need to panic so long as you are thriving where you are and taking every opportunity you can to improve yourself. As they say, cream will always rise to the top, so be prepared always where you are, and have confidence that whatever you are thrown into, you will rise to the top.

40+FAB Blog

Don’t fight the system

By Olaolu Faj Opebiyi on

June 7, 2021

- 40+FAB Blog

We all have one story or another of how ‘the system’ has failed us or someone close to us. So that whether we therefore fight against the system or put up with it, we generally view it as a bad thing.

Nature and science teaches us that the most efficient way to get things done is through a system. Our biological make up is a combination of systems, like respiratory, reproductive, circulatory etc. When a system is not working as it should, we need to repair it or replace it with one that does. In other words, we look for ways to improve it rather than trying to bring it down.

Every system is set up to meet a genuine need and even though it may be hijacked, the need it was meant to fill always remains valid. If systems that we trust and depend on seem to be failing us, we have a choice to fight for improvement, or to seek alternative systems which would fulfil the same function. If your family fails you, reach out to friends that will be there for you. If a government service fails you, there are opportunities to be explored with non-government or private institutions.

Systems are never the problem, so let’s channel our energies into solving for the right things and not waste time fighting against fundamental principles that make us try to reinvent the wheel rather than repair it or replace it.

40+FAB Blog

Propaganda wars

By Olaolu Faj Opebiyi on

June 6, 2021

- 40+FAB Blog

Ever since man got to know the power of possessing resources, we have waged war thousands and thousands of times to acquire or maintain that control. Whether it be for physical, spiritual, or intellectual things, great battles at hefty costs have been fought to keep them.

Though we pride ourselves in so called civilisation, we have yet multiplied wars through much more sophisticated and sometimes subtle means. Some of the biggest battles being fought have had no artillery fired or sword wielded, yet much has been conquered and brought under the control of the forces who advance so stealthily.

Long before the maturity of the Information Age we live in, strategic warfare involved the physical possession of other cultures whilst destroying the documented body of knowledge that culture possessed. But today, it is hard to do so because of the prevalence of channels to disseminate information, so this has led to the guerrilla warfare that uses propaganda as the chief weapon.

When the records of history expose systems that were oppressive, propaganda changes the narrative and represents what was evil as good, and justifies the philosophies that produced those systems, maybe because we still harbour those beliefs under the attire of our civilised garb.

In the same vein, what has been adhered to for millennia as being morally good, is now debatable and one can get targeted for trying to defend those beliefs. We cannot afford to be complacent in these state of affairs, as our minds and opinions are choice bounty to be taken willingly or by the force of propaganda.

40+FAB Blog

Gambling your problems away

By Olaolu Faj Opebiyi on

June 5, 2021

- 40+FAB Blog

We have all been at that place where we wished for more money. I know I have, and just like most of you, I thought of gambling or playing the lottery with the hope of winning enough money to solve my problems. Most of the very rich will tell you that one of the secrets to solving financial problems is to save your money. Sadly, too many will find it hard to keep that advice and end up struggling with unrealistic measures to break out of financial instability.

The same holds true for other problems we face, be it a marital one, a career, a business, a course of study, or any other significant thing that affects our total well being. We wish, we wish, we wish. But there are no short cuts to solving the issues that need to be addressed.

If it is relational, time must be spent building trust and investing in the other person. Telling off a spouse, manipulating them, threatening, e.t.c. does nothing to make a marriage better. On the other hand, doing all the right things for just one day is like buying that lottery ticket and hoping that the next morning everything will magically be alright, and you will reap the best relationship ever.

Let us apply the principles of patience and consistent effort in doing the right things, just like saving, to build up in every area of our lives the foundation of a truly successful existence.

40+FAB Blog

Problems and problem solvers

By Olaolu Faj Opebiyi on

June 4, 2021

- 40+FAB Blog

Problems are meant to be solved and every single one of them has a solution. It takes time, the will, knowledge, and patience to get past every problem.

Some have problems and lament, ‘why me?’ They give up pursuing the path they desire to avoid the problem in the way. Yet there are others who would say, ‘I will get through this no matter how tough it seems, there is surely a way through.’ These ones persist until they find a way to move ahead despite the debilitating setbacks.

I heard the story of a couple who had a son born with spinal deformities which meant he would be unable to walk for the rest of his life. They had to put on hold their thriving business for a whole year to attend to him. When they picked up thier businesses again, they bounced back and became very successful and influential, in spite of the challenges they still faced with their son. One of the things they learnt through the process was how to become really good at solving problems. They developed a sense of tenacity to never give up in pursuing a desired outcome.

After the initial shock of what was their reality, they dusted themselves off and thought through, planned and executed how they would still live their lives well in spite of their challenge. Today, they have helped thousands personally and in business. The Dornan’s have certainly not allowed problems to be a limitation, but rather a catalyst to be all they desired to be.

We need to revisit the role of problems in our lives. Yes we would rather not have them, but they are the very thing that we need to turn us into more rounded, tenacious and effective solution minded individuals.

40+FAB Blog

The right guide

By Olaolu Faj Opebiyi on

June 3, 2021

- 40+FAB Blog

Nothing saves you more time and guarantees more success than having the right guide. I remember trying to put together the pieces of an Ikea wardrobe. The instruction set got mixed up and though I started out ok, I soon got stuck. I then realised that the hour of work I had put in was wasted and I had to take it all apart and start over when I realised my mistake.

A guide has been there before and done what you are trying to do. They know enough about the mistakes that can be made and the most efficient way to achieve the goals you set. Be it a person or some other means like a manual or multimedia, the guide will ensure the quickest route to get to the destination.

There are many guides out there, but there is one that is perfect for you, to get you over your victory line. Don’t go it alone or struggle with just any guide, rather invest some time, money and effort in securing the right guide. It will certainly make a huge difference in every area you need it to.

40+FAB Blog

Free speech doesn’t exist

By Olaolu Faj Opebiyi on

June 2, 2021

- 40+FAB Blog

‘Freedom of speech is the right to seek, receive and impart information and ideas of all kinds, by any means. ‘ Freedom of speech and the right to freedom of expression applies to ideas of all kinds including those that may be deeply offensive.

But, is free speech truly free, or has it ever been? In our times, the avenues to express oneself have proliferated greatly, and one would think that this would have a great effect in advancing free speech, however, the opposite seems to be happening.

Free speech only seems to exist when you say what others that think like you want to hear. That has always been the case over the centuries, and as much as we try to sugar coat it, things are still the same today. Say what you like and someone will come after you. It could be the people, the press, or the police. On one hand you may get cancelled, on the other hand you may be arrested.

Fighting for free speech has become a classic case of animal farm. The ones that were supposed to protect the rest of the oppressed have now become a law to themselves and are becoming a new type of oppressor. People are going after other people, trolling them or accusing them of hate when they don’t agree with thier opinions. Respected journalists are branding people liars when they tell thier stories, or reporting in a way to stir up sentiments that appeal to a factional ideology.

In today’s world of ‘free speech’, you are at liberty to say what you choose and how you choose, but remember that everyone eventually becomes a prisoner of thier own words. Your words will always stand to justify or condemn you, so use your ability to speak freely very wisely.

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40+FAB Blog

When light comes

By Olaolu Faj Opebiyi on

June 1, 2021

- 40+FAB Blog

When light comes, it reveals all things that before its coming could not be seen. The greatest source of natural light, the sun, teaches us that light shows up slowly, giving us the chance to wake up from our slumber and dress up to show up in the way we would want to be seen.

Light also signifies enlightenment, knowledge or understanding of how the world around us works. Again, enlightenment is a process which starts slowly, taking us from a place of ignorance to prevalence over our circumstance.

If one does not respond to the light when it comes, making the necessary changes that it enables us to, then there is a tendency that it will reveal our nakedness of the night, leading to shame. However, if we work steadily with the light, making the improvements and changes that we should, then it will reveal preparedness leading to honour.

Take for instance one starting out at school, or a new job, or business, or marriage. The ‘start up’ has much to learn and is somewhat at the beginning of thier day where the light is rising slowly. They soon begin to increase thier knowledge and have opportunities to change and grow as the day wears on. After a good while, demands will be placed on the start up to perform, not on the fringes, but in the arena where all can see in the brightness of thier light. The day of the examination, or the performance review, or the overwhelming demand of customers, or the challenges of relationships, is likely to reveal what the start up is made of.

When the light comes, what will you do? When the light shines bright, will you be ready? Have you been shown up for better or worse? Whatever has happened in the past is past, for just like the day moves from dawn till dusk, so you will have the opportunity for that light to come again, rising slowly and giving you the opportunity to be ready when next it shows you up.

PREVIOUS POSTSPage 4 of 63NEXT POSTS

Keep your head up

Are you open for debate?

The outsider

Don’t fight the system

Propaganda wars

Gambling your problems away

Problems and problem solvers

The right guide

Free speech doesn’t exist

When light comes