40+FAB Blog

Let it go!

I learnt that one of the best ways to heal from hurts is to learn lessons from the situation and use those to focus on growth and forward momentum. If we get stuck in thinking about what has happened to us, we can become immobilised in painful feelings and memories. If you don’t let it go, you might stagnate while the other party moves on making great strides which may upset you even more.

Here are a few tips on what to do if you find yourself in that position.

  • You have to kill negative thoughts that come in questions like, “What’s wrong with me?” “How did this happen to me?” Counteract them with positive affirmations like, “This is a great opportunity to start over the right way and with the right people”.
  • It’s ok to allow yourself to grieve, be angry, disappointed or sad. Acknowledge how you feel, express those feelings and then put them behind you as you look to the future.
  • Share your experience and your pain with those close to you. Don’t bottle it up, be free to talk about it as you process your emotions.

Above all, choose to forgive because this is for your own good. Holding on to it will cause you to be eaten up from the inside. Not forgiving has been likened to drinking poison and expecting the person who hurt you to be harmed by it. Letting it go will free you both inside and out.