40+FAB Blog

Keeping transformative associates

A good conversation is an open door that leads one into the possibility of a new relationship. This applies to all, from the prime leader of a nation, establishment or movement, to the young child making a new friend at school. What is said has the potential to win hearts and minds. 
People are important, and most times they hold the key to new experiences that we want to enter. They become a kind of gatekeeper to those things. 

When I was growing up, no one needed to tell me that mummy was the gatekeeper to good things like sweets and ice cream. As long as I was a ‘good boy’ and did those things she approved of, I got my regular fix. When I failed to hold up my end of this mutually beneficial relationship, I missed out on my goodies. 

Do you remember the gatekeepers to the cliques you so wanted to be a part of in high school? As long as they were your friends, everyone in the group was fine with you, but when you fell out with them, the whole group turned its back on you. I fell out with such a gatekeeper once in primary school, and when everyone turned their back on me, I took matters into my own hands by roughing him up pretty badly. I eventually made that relationship good by revisiting the basics for establishing one – good conversation. 

Holding on to the right relationship is an important factor that can make or break us. There is a proverb that says “show me your friends and I will tell you who you are.” 

Who do you want to be? There is someone, somewhere who is key to helping you be that person. You need to find them and initiate a relationship with them, holding on to it until that connection serves it purpose. 

Hold on to observation, contemplation, conversation and relation.