40+FAB Blog

It is usually said that practice makes perfect, but I have come to look at that statement differently since I heard this quote, said to be given by an American Navy Seal in response to how they handle challenges, he said, “We don’t rise to the occasion, we sink to the level of our training”.

In other words, when hell and high water are thrown in our direction, who we really are comes out. We should therefore look at practice as the avenue to develop and unravel the base personality we will be when we are faced with our toughest challenges.

I am learning to look at challenges and instead of thinking how do I overcome this, I am changing my focus to how will I show up in this. If I am able to train my best self to always show up as the leader, the thinker, the creative, the compassionate, the mentally tough, the problem solver, and so on, then it doesn’t matter what the challenge is, I will be able to surmount it.

So how are you training yourself on a daily basis? What’s your practice? What’s your routine to build up on your strength’s, capacities and capabilities? Invest in these practices now, so that in the day you are challenged, the person you will be can overcome.

40+FAB Blog

It is really true that the best way to learn anything is by copying another. This has been our mode of learning right from when we were born. However, at some point when we have learnt the basics, we are to explore them and improve on what we have learnt to become great at what we are meant to be in life.

There are many people that play tennis for instance, so what makes one go on to dominate tournaments for years while others play catch up? They all probably learnt the same techniques, have similar racquets and hit the same balls. Learning to become competent is one thing, but learning to be the very best you can be is another thing.

The martial arts expert Bruce Lee said, “I do not fear him who has practiced a thousand different kicks, but I fear him who has practiced one type of kick a thousand times”. We practice inferiority when we only do enough to get by, or even when we learn all there is about a subject but never master any aspect of it.

We stop practising inferiority when we focus on the thing that is our area of strength and we develop it until we become the very best in the world at doing it.

40+FAB Blog

I heard one of the worlds top performance psychologists say, “Limits are physical, limitations are psychological” – Denis Waitley.

It reminded me of the story of the fully grown elephant who was tied with a rope to a small stump in the ground. This huge creature with the ability to take down a tree could not break free from the seemingly ineffective tether that kept it bound. How is that even possible?

You have to understand the story of that elephant, it was conditioned, from when it was a baby and physically unable to break free from a rope, it was made to believe that it would never be strong enough to break free.

So here we have a massive elephant who has outgrown what is it’s limit (the physical rope and stump), but has never outgrown what is it’s limitation (the psychological belief that it can’t break the limit).

May we recognise that our limits are only as strong as our limitations. May we understand that we have grown and become stronger than what used to have power over us. May we break free from every psychological chain that keeps freedom as a thing far flung into the future. May we rise up today and walk out on the things that have held us down in places we ought not to be.

40+FAB Blog

In the history of nations, whenever the people rose up to demand what was rightfully theirs and the powers that be responded by shedding the blood of it’s people, that bloodshed never stopped the movement, and revolution became inevitable.

My heart weeps for my kinsmen in Nigeria at this time, the unnecessary injustices and inequity that pervade in the land has to stop. The youth will not be intimidated, they will not go back to what it has always been, change is inevitable, the tables will be toppled and turned.

The bloodshed that was meant to stop this movement will turn out to be the fuel that will burn out those that have occupied and mismanaged the house for too long.

40+FAB Blog

Different people have different personality types. On one end of the spectrum you have people who are very driven to accomplish things, while on the other end are those who are quite laid back and almost seem happy with any status quo.

You would think that it is only the driven personality type that has all the great accomplishments, but I have come to realise that all personality types have achieved outstanding things.

So what really drives achievement? I believe that one of the essential ingredients of any achievement is a strong sense of purpose, or the ‘why’ that an individual has.

People find a why in various forms like the need to solve a problem causing pain, or the need to help another, or to satisfy curiosity, or to compete with another, or to keep up with peer pressure, or to spite others, or to feel significant, and many other reasons. Whether the reasons be noble or malevolent, it does bring on the desire and the mettle required to accomplish things.

The genuine feeling of accomplishment and satisfaction therefore can only come from the one who knows the reason why they pursued that achievement.

40+FAB Blog

As someone who was not particularly blessed with the gift of dancing, I have spent a bit of time trying to understand how to do it better. The instructors would say, move to the rhythm, move to the beat.

There is a rhythm to every piece of music, and the dancer knows how to catch that beat and move with it. They hear the beat, but they also understand the offbeat. To get into the beat, you must be prepared to latch onto it from an offbeat.

Progress is like a stream of flowing music that you need to move with to get great results in life. You must prepare yourself in the place that is not seeing much movement, the offbeat of life, so that when the next beat comes around, you jump onto it and keep moving to the beat then resting, refreshing and re-planning on the off beat, waiting for the next beat to come around.

Just like a good dancer, you can learn to cooperate with all the forces of life that make progress happen, and move with them. Move with a teachable heart, move with mentors, move with knowledge, move with opportunity, move with hard work, move with the willingness to lead, move with curiosity, move with the ability to take risks, move with what other successful people have moved with.

Remember, you can study on the offbeat what will make you move successfully with the rhythm of progress.

40+FAB Blog

You must have heard by now of the protests taking place in Nigeria, the most populous black nation on earth, over the recent unlawful killings of young people by a police special unit called SARS (Special Anti Robbery Squad).

Nigeria became an independent nation from colonial rule in the 1960’s, and the generation of young men and woman that were part of that effort are still unfortunately very much a part of the present government parastatals, industries and other facets of the fabric of society.

Some of these octogenarians keep on referring to the youth that are not ready to take over the reins of government. The Youth they refer to are probably in their 50’s. Years of bad governance and failing to provide an environment of possibilities for at least two generations since it’s independence has led to this outcry. The ‘youth’ and the real youth are saying, enough is enough.

It has taken this long for the youth to rise up and demand what is theirs. Why were they quiet for this long? Was it because they were viewed as not yet being ready? Did they believe the label placed on them by the older generation? Were they waiting in the wings for a handover and became passive in the process? Or was it the older generation that somehow still believed they must carry on their own heads the legacy of building (or not) a nation entrusted to them? Did they forget that a generation has its time and must pass on the baton to the next?

Who got stuck? Whoever it was, I hope this is the movement that will get this nation unstuck and moving in the right direction that the whole of Africa and indeed the world has been waiting for.

40+FAB Blog

The value of preparation cannot be overemphasised, and its not just for the big and important things only, but also for the small and seemingly insignificant.

I had been having regular meetings with my business mentor and I would report back on things I had done since our last meeting. Because I had completed the tasks set for me, I would just get on the calls and rattle off what I had done. One day, I took some time to actually think about what I had done and how best to talk it through with my mentor. Those few minutes I spent preparing were like gold because they made such a huge difference in the outcome of our meeting. What we covered in that one meeting would have probably taken three or more meetings to complete if there was not that very little time spent to think about a seemingly obvious part of my meeting.

Can you identify a few places where you can practice preparation and save time? Do you have all you need to brush your teeth in the morning? Could you spend 5 mins to bring out the clothes you will wear the next day and save 30 mins in the morning? Can a few minutes on your things-to-do list today turn tomorrow into a massively productive day?

Start with something really small, but stick with it and watch how much time and energy you will save from being just that little bit more prepared.

40+FAB Blog

Some research has shown that of those who had to perform a task or series of tasks daily over a long period of time, the ones most likely to successfully complete the actions required were those who were kind to themselves when they missed out on a day or two of following through on their daily task.

As much as we should be tough on ourselves and stamp out laziness and indeed every vice that limits our effectiveness in life, we have to balance it out with a genuine care and kindness towards ourselves. After all, we are human, fallible, mortal and sometimes inadequate.

Recognising that we can fail, and when we do not beating ourselves up for it is an awesome perspective to have and it somehow frees us to do even better as we know that we are in our own corner rooting for ourselves, and that personal support will do wonders for us to achieve even greater success. As a wise teacher once said, self care is not selfish, so do be kind and caring towards yourself.

40+FAB Blog

For lasting change to occur in any society, its people must have to be unanimously awaken to the need for that change and that conscious awareness and desire for the change brings about a revolution that makes such a change possible.

Just like a dream, no matter how much you desire it, you must wake up and do something about it otherwise it just remains a wish that lingers somewhere in the distant future.

One thing that holds us back is the question how? How will it happen? How can I make that change? How do I get there? A wise man once said, you never know how until you have done it.

If you are awake from your dream, if you are aware that change needs to happen, then just make a move for it, replace your how with a move in some direction and you will find that as you get going, things become clearer, direction, focus and the ability to do all come together to get you to that desired future.

Just keep moving and do not negotiate with the lure to stay where you are or be placated with cosmetic changes that do nothing to uproot the true cause of your stagnancy. Keep moving and the dream will soon become a reality.

#ForANewNigeria #EndPoliceBrutality #EndBadGovernance