40+FAB Blog

Tell me what to expect

There is a reason why businesses sign contracts where one party is providing a service to the other. It is important that the supplier is clear about what the client needs and that the solution being provided meets that need. It helps everyone to be on the same page, it saves time and resources, and reduces the possibility of conflict.

In a social setting however, like a family or a group of friends, people don’t generally sign pages of legal documents with clearly stated terms, but this is probably where we need it most. There is a simpler way to get expectations across and even though it sounds simplistic, it is very effective.

Tell me what to expect of you and tell me what you expect of me. The trajectory of relationships must be fired by these conversations over and over again. The confidence in knowing what to expect produces trust which is one of the major backbones of any relationship. Never take for granted this little matter of telling others what to expect, neither should you shy away from asking them too.

You also need to have that conversation with yourself. Say it out loud so you hear it. Sometimes we are in conflict about what we do in comparison to what we expect from ourselves. It could be that we expect too much, or we have burdened ourselves with someone else’s expectation of us. Be honest with yourself and be clear about what you want from you, then you can communicate that to others also.